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[personal profile] perfectcrime
What's been going on with this relationship drama, and no colorr because i just now noticed it has a html version but fuck i c+p'd everything already.


 Older John:
"-- bunniesHeir [BH] began pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 20:08 --
BH: hi dave!
PC: sup john
BH: heheh, not much!
BH: this place is kind of weird but i found a bunch of dvds so it's obviously not too bad.
PC: you get used to it, even if most people never leave their rooms
PC: what horrible movies did you find
BH: hey, they're not horrible!
BH: and i found con air :)
PC: i restate my previous comment
PC: horrible movies
BH: not cool bro, not cool.
PC: haha
BH: you just don't have the tastes for classics man.
PC: okay fine decent but not amazing movies
PC: i now take that back
BH: pfffft.
BH: so what've you been up to then??
PC: chilling with my roommate and other people
PC: hosting wicked parties
PC: trying to make sis realize that girl you still trusts her
BH: of course, only the coolest parties for the cool kid right?
PC: and to not leave alchohol in juiceboxes
BH: ...girl me?
PC: jane
BH: welp.
BH: not as weird as strider me i guess!
PC: there's a lalonde you
PC: and a dead you
BH: dead me?
PC: yeah apparantly
BH: that's kinda disturbing.
PC: only seen him one time
BH: billy isn't ever going to play nice.
BH: i said. put. the bunny. BACK. in the box.
BH: oh billy.
BH: why couldn't you put the bunny back in the box?
PC: john
PC: are you
PC: seriously
BH: yes, yes i am.
PC: john i will punch you in the dick
PC: and feel no regret
BH: hey!
BH: not cool man.
BH: not cool.
PC: i have watched con air too many times
PC: don't do this to me man
BH: most murders are crimes of necessity rather than desire. but the great ones? domer, gacy, bundy... they did it because it excited them.
PC: oh my god youre doing this to me
BH: what if i told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years, at the end of which they tell you to piss off. ending up in some retirement villge, hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time. wouldn't you consider that to be insane?
PC: why am i friends with egberts
PC: there is no good egbert
PC: they are all evil
BH: it's my daughters birthday today. so please, feel free not to share anything with me.
BH: eheheheh.
BH: so, what's up with you?
BH: look, this is me stopping the awesome movie quotes for a minute to ask about my best friend's current life in this weird place.
BH: anything interesting going on?
PC: trying to get my roommate to stop fussing over me
BH: who's your roommate?
PC: gamzee makara
PC: a stoned one
BH: oh wow.
BH: good thing!
BH: those other ones can be kind of unnerving.
PC: i think they're hilarious
BH: you would.
PC: fuckers aren't scary john
BH: hey, i said unnerving, not scary!
PC: shhh john its okay
PC: you need your ghost blanky
PC: i understand
PC: but no they don't phase me anymore
BH: :P
PC: when a psycho is constantly macking on you they seems more like morons than threats i guess
BH: ...
BH: wait
BH: what?
PC: you'll figure it out
PC: anyway
PC: you should come over
PC: throwing a party over here
BH: no that's bullshit.
BH: you can't say something like that and then say it's nothing.
PC: why cant i
BH: because now i gotta know man!
PC: nope
PC: now that you're curious i cant tell you
BH: do i have to ask around?
BH: there's a bunch of names on my list i don't recognize, don't make me start iming random people!
BH: i swear, i will copy and paste what you said to everyone that's online and ask if they know anything about it.
PC: what
PC: that's a dirty move and you know it
BH: let's see, who's online?
BH: dave.
PC: you won't
BH: my best friends for the past four years have been you, karkat and vriska.
BH: do you think i won't?
BH: do you really?
PC: four years
PC: ...
PC: fuck i hate this place
PC: everyone sucks
PC: fine
BH: knew you'd see things my way! :D
BH: you have ten seconds before i start iming people.
PC: why are you my friend
PC: you suck
PC: fine
BH: because i'm awesome?
PC: i have a blackrom thing with a sobergamzee
PC: there
PC: happy
BH: oh wow.
BH: really?
PC: yeah
PC: when i die and go to hell it'll be filled with egberts
PC: egbert hell
BH: yep!
BH: egbert hell, now even more frightening than karkat hell.
PC: now you cant come over
PC: i am taking that right away
BH: well then you can't come over to watch my awesome movies!
BH: but that's fine.
BH: i know you'll change your mind soon anyways. :D
BH: so what's his handle?
PC: why do you need that
BH: no reason!
BH: just curious :)
PC: oh that seems legit
PC: except not
BH: it's trancendingClown, isn't it?
PC: what the fuck
BH: i remember gamzee's original handle was tc!
BH: that's a yes.
PC: why do you have everyone already on your roll
BH: i don't know actually.
BH: i found a list and just added a bunch of people from it.
BH: it was downstairs in the directory.
PC: i need to get slick to burn the directory again
BH: :P
PC: dont bug him about this john
BH: too late.
PC: fuck
PC: egbert i swear to god
PC: do not tell him anything
BH: aw, come on!
BH: it's not that bad.
BH: what wouldn't you want me to tell him?
PC: he is going to use it against me idiot
PC: everything is ware fare
PC: war*
PC: fuck
BH: you know dave, i've never understood that hatemance thing.
BH: how do you do it?
PC: i dont know exactly
PC: i barely know whats going on
BH: well, maybe you can tell me what you think about him and that can help me understand!
PC: i hate him and his stupid 'im a god and everything is useless to me' attitude and his stupid fucking faces and creepy laughs
PC: what is that bullshit about me being the cause of everything shitty for him even
PC: i sent him that video sure but not my fault he had a damn crisis over it
BH: besides that, how do you feel about him?
BH: like, what do you feel when you're around him?
PC: like i want to punch him
PC: and be closer
PC: i want to fight with him but not like normal fighting
PC: i dont know egbert why am i talking about this
BH: because i don't know how to mind my own business obviously.
BH: so tell me more.
BH: and maybe i have totally alterior motives, here who knows?
BH: (eheheheh)
BH: so come on, what else?
PC: alterior-fgvbu
BH: nothing that concerns you, i swear!
PC: are you
PC: sending this to him
BH: i've just never understood you know?
BH: no, no no! nothing like that!
PC: swear you arent showing anyone this
BH: i swear on con air, i am not showing this to anyone.
PC: fine
PC: i like him for being interesting and fun to play against even though everything he does pisses me off
PC: you cant trust him to tell you anything but he does what he says and i want to choke him for that
PC: but fuck
PC: when he stops talking to me i get pissed to
BH: so, how can you tell the difference between hate and love?
PC: he started all this and he thinks he can just ignore me?
PC: i just went with what he wanted
PC: i mean i love my john
PC: its different with him somehow
PC: but thats sweet shit and i guess gamzee is spicy
PC: that doesnt even work as an explanatiob
PC: explanation
BH: it kind of does.
BH: how do you know it's not just two different kinds of love?
PC: because it might be for me but trolls dont do that shit
PC: and he said he doesnt even know what he feels for me man
PC: fucking bullshit
BH: is it for you? i mean, could it be?
PC: ...
PC: i dont know
PC: wouldnt that be cheating
BH: come on dave, think about this really hard!
PC: to love two people like that
BH: well, not if you can work something out.
PC: john doesnt want to share me
PC: he made that really clear
BH: but he's okay with the hatemance thing?
PC: uhm
PC: well
BH: ...
BH: he doesn't know, does he?
PC: i dont think i ever told him it got to making out levels
BH: /double facepalm combo
PC: he knew it was happening okay
PC: i just
PC: he sprung hate makeouts on me like a day or two ago
PC: and i dont know what the fuck is going on anymore
PC: sdfg dfucking hold on for a sec equius is throwing shit at me
PC: okay fine he's distracted
BH: ok
BH: ...
BH: i think
BH: i know how to get around this situation maybe.
BH: other me is still 13, right? so he still might not get a bunch of things, especially when it comes to trolls.
BH: i mean, he might not want to share at first, but if you put another troll into the picture who's crushing on him, either red or black, there could be a way to get him to understand trolls more.
PC: i dunno
PC: i dont want to hurt him
PC: but i dont want to stop anything either
BH: idealy. what is it you want with gamzee?
PC: fuck
PC: i think i messed up again
BH: you want them the same way, don't you?
PC: yes
PC: kind of
PC: oh my fuck i'm horrible
BH: no you're not.
BH: you're a prepubescent boy with a shitload of confusing emotions going on.
BH: perfectly normal.
PC: this is why i am not the hero of anything
PC: all i do is fuck shit up and try to fix it
BH: dave, that's not true so shut up.
BH: you don't fuck shit up, so stop being hard on yourself.
BH: what would bro say if he heard you say that?
PC: hed say nothing
PC: just beat the crap out of me
PC: maybe i should do that, let sis or bro beat me up till this stops being confusing
BH: soooooooo...
PC: sorry i dropped the laptop
BH: that's fine.
BH: back on subject.
BH: does other me have a chumhandle on this thing? i mean, the one you're with. i'm getting the idea that there's a bunch of multiples around this place.
BH: i think i might need to talk to him personally, see if i can help.
BH: i've got two sides of the three side thing going on here and it's kind of hard to piece together without the last side.
PC: he's not on a lot
PC: two sides
PC: what
BH: nothing!
BH: you heard nothing.
PC: you're talking to gamzee about this?
BH: no.
PC: derpyHeir is my john
BH: okay, maybe. but i'm under strict confidence not to say anything! i swore on con air dude! so don't say a word to gamzee that you know i'm talking to him, ok?
PC: fine
PC: being 13 sucks
PC: hormones suck
BH: yeeeeeeeep.
BH: glad i'm over that crap.
PC: now you suck even more
BH: you're just jealous. :P
PC: fuck if i was older i could deal with this crap
BH: well, you're not so i'm dealing with it for you. "
Gamzee:
"-- transcendingClown [TC] began pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 21:01 --
TC: hello, dave.
PC: hey gamzee
PC: sup
TC: ...
PC: ...
PC: stop doting at me
PC: thats weird
TC: ah.
TC: .
PC: you got something to say dont you
-- transcendingClown [TC] ceased pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 21:03 --
-- transcendingClown [TC] ceased pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 21:03 --
PC: what was that
-- transcendingClown [TC] began pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 21:03 --
TC: ...
TC: blasphemer.
TC: dave.
TC: what
TC: are
TC: we?
PC: why
PC: are
PC: you typing
PC: like
PC: this
TC: shut up.
PC: and i dont know
PC: i thought you wanted me to be your kismesis
TC: yes.
PC: has that like
PC: changed or something
TC: i don't
TC: know.
PC: ... are you feelin okay
PC: you aint sick or something right
PC: go lay the fuck down if you are
TC: ...
TC: no.
PC: so then
PC: you dont know what you feel?
TC: no.
PC: that whole.. uh well that whole 'incident' sure seemed like you knew what you wanted
TC: that.
TC: yes
TC: that.
TC: i want to do that again.
PC: i dont mind doing that again
TC: heh.
PC: but dont give me any more visible bruises dammit
PC: i told you humans bruise easily
TC: but i like seeing them on you.
PC: and i liked seeing indigo blood but i'm not going to cut you up all the time
PC: totally not fair
PC: mine last longer
TC: h
TC: heh
TC: .
PC: you need to come over later?
PC: i'm throwing a party but i can leave early
TC: party?
PC: yeah
PC: i'm bored and have some booze left
PC: gonna give it to whoever comes over
PC: i am over drinking
TC: booze is?
PC: booze is alchohol
TC: oh.
PC: you know what that is right
TC: yes.
TC: i accidentally got myself drunk a while back.
PC: oh shit really
PC: that must have been golden
TC: shut up.
PC: make me
TC: later.
PC: fine
PC: oh god is john bothering you
PC: ignore everything he says
TC: hahaha.
PC: what is he even saying
TC: talking about how awesome you are is all.
TC: askin if i want to know shit about you.
PC: what
PC: what
PC: what the hell egbert
TC: do i want to know anythin, dave? :o)
PC: no
PC: you dont
PC: nothing at all
TC: heheheh.
PC: i have entered hell
PC: shut up
PC: i know you're laughing still
TC: no.
TC: i'm talkin with john.
PC: ugh i'm going to get something to drink
PC: and throw it at equius
TC: hahaha.
PC: then i will feel better and have revenge
PC: he stuffed cheesypoofs down my shirt
TC: i can kill him if you want.
PC: nah
PC: you'd have a pissed off zee after you
PC: gamzee vs titzee would happen
TC: i could kill her too.
PC: killing everyone for little old me
PC: romantic
TC: he
TC: h.
PC: just kick him when you get over here
TC: aight.
PC: he's not going to be leaving consious
TC: heheheh.
TC: you have a redrom.
TC: when did you have a redrom?
PC: well i dont know if its a redrom according to troll standards
PC: but i've been seeing john for a while?
PC: i thought i told you man
TC: you did?
PC: it was in one of the games i think
PC: but fuck i dont know whats going on with that either
TC: ...
-- transcendingClown [TC] ceased pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 22:18 --
PC: dude
PC: what did i do now
-- transcendingClown [TC] began pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 22:20 --
TC: ...
PC: im sorry
PC: i thought you knew
PC: i should have made sure
PC: fuck gamzee
TC: whatever.
-- perfectCrime [PC] ceased pestering transcendingClown [TC] at 22:33 --
-- perfectCrime [PC] began pestering transcendingClown [TC] at 22:35 --
PC: fuck sorry
PC: i dropped the laptop
PC: look does it bother you i'm seeing john?
TC: yes.
PC: i want to work shit out if it does
PC: sorry
TC: you alright?
PC: no
TC: physically.
PC: a little less than yes
TC: ...
TC: i
TC: i'm
TC: dammit.
TC: i'm motherfuckin
TC: sorry.
-- transcendingClown [TC] ceased pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 22:39 --
PC: gamzee you fuckass
PC: why are you sorry
PC: augh
-- perfectCrime [PC] began pestering transcendingClown [TC] at 22:40 --
TC: as a troll
TC: i should be content with blackrom.
PC: are you not
PC: i mean
TC: no.
PC: what is this then
PC: i dont know whats going on gamzee and i dont like it
TC: i thought
TC: a human relationship
TC: maybe.
TC: but
TC: you already have one.
PC: yeah i do
PC: and i thought that regular troll shit was what you wanted
PC: so i left it at that
TC: yes.
TC: i...
TC: yes.
PC: god dammit gamzee
PC: just
PC: get over here
PC: because suddenly everything is confusing and i'm going to fix this
PC: i like you in a different way i like john
PC: but i dont want to give either of you up
PC: like the selfish ass i am
TC: ...
TC: okay.
-- transcendingClown [TC] ceased pestering perfectCrime [PC] at 23:13 -- "
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Dave Strider

October 2011

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